Girl School for Grownups

Like having a big sister, but better because I can't boss you around!

Bad tenants

on November 1, 2014

It’s getting cold here in California and today I grabbed a pair of black cargo pants that I consider my party pants because they’re roomy enough to feel like sweats. At least that’s how they used to feel. Today I was grateful they buttoned at all, and as I sit here both my waist and my thighs feel like sausage. I’ve known I was gaining weight. The scale tells me. I can feel it in my body when I cross my legs. You know how when you frost a cake, you dip the spatula in the frosting and then spread it everywhere it should go? Yeah, that’s me right now.

How the pounds have arrived is no mystery. I invited them with Doritos and Twizzlers and frosting and sadness and naps. Now it feels like I have bad tenants who won’t leave. Because I’m ready to be lean RIGHT NOW, and yet the extra weight is STILL HERE! (In case you are a specifics and numbers person like my husband, we’re talking about 10 pounds or so. You’re welcome.)

The good news is that I know how to evict my crappy tenants. They hate vegetables and protein. They can’t stand long hilly walks and running and yoga. They think water tastes like nothing at all. (No wait, that’s me. But I drink it anyway.) And want to know the best news of all? The number on the scale means absolutely nothing, unless I decide I want to take up boxing or wrestling.


And now for some housekeeping. From the heart, thank you to everyone who has subscribed to my blog. I try to write as though nobody will read the words, and yet knowing that you’ll read the words is what makes it possible to write. If you like what you see here, would you consider sharing my writing on Facebook? Later this month I’ll be doing a drawing for a prize — an actual prize! All subscribers will be entered into the drawing, and those who have shared the blog will receive an additional entry. Have an amazing day!

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